Date of birth: Sunday 30 April 2006 Time: 5.31am 
Place of birth: St. Helier Hospital, Wrythe Lane, Carshalton
Weight: 9lb

Date of birth: Friday 28 December 2007 Time: ? 
Place of birth: St. Helier Hospital, Wrythe Lane, Carshalton
Weight: 6lb 13oz

This is the website of two brothers, Ethan and Jake Griffin. The website and domain name were created by me, their Grandad, Wayne.









On 28 December 2018, Jake’s birthday, his Mum wrote on Facebook:
Reflecting on my Jake’s time here on earth. And I am proud that I have kept him alive for this long. He is the most accident-prone child, and now he’s at the ages where he tells me I’m embarrassing him. 
So Jake, just for you on your birthday, here is a list of all the times you have embarrassed me:
– 4 years old in Victor Seymour playground, you walked behind me and pushed my skirt up so all the parents saw my knickers!
– 6 years old, at the top of the London Eye, you popped a balloon and everyone thought it was gunshots, so they screamed. An old lady nearly had a heart attack.
– 7 years old in Tesco’s wine aisle shouting out; ‘My mums an alcoholic.’ I nearly died of embarrassment.
– 9 years old, meeting Chris’s son for the first time, sitting down for dinner you announced: ‘my mum is a pole dancer!’ 
– 10 years old, you asked if I could do a handstand, so I willingly showed you, and you pulled my trousers down whilst I was upside down.

Hopefully, you’ve grown out of these antics now. Happy Birthday, son.

“Mum I’m hungry, if you just give me a chocolate bar I won’t be hungry again, I promise!” 
Jake, 1 April 2012

Found Ethan on his computer watching YouTube: ‘how to make fake dog poo!’… What’s worse, he insisted he absolutely had to watch it again!
Kelly, 9 March 2012

Ethan told our neighbours that he was a vegetarian!! So neighbour asked: ‘What’s your favourite veg meal?’ Ethan replied: ‘CHICKEN ON A BONE!’
Kelly, 30 March 2012

Jake asked: ‘Mum, why do you have Ethan and me?’ 
Me: ‘Because Daddy and I made you!’ 
Ethan: ‘Did you make us from materials?’
Kelly, 29 November 2011

You know the games Connect 4 with all the coins and Operation with all the small pieces and Wiggly Worms with all the worms and Tree Bugs with all the bugs? And Kerplunk with all the marbles and Hungry Hippos with all the balls? Imagine someone just opening up all the boxes and throwing them all on the floor! That’s more than 100 little pieces! THANKS, JAKE!
Kelly, 1 January 2012

Was trying to teach Ethan what to say to a ‘999’ call if I fell down the stairs and was not moving. I told him to say ‘my mummy’s fallen and stopped moving’ so then I asked Ethan ‘what do you say to them?’ his reply: ‘MY MUMS DEAD, CAN YOU GET AMBULANCE, TO PICK HER UP?!’ – hmmm need to work on that one!
Kelly, 19 January 2012

Jake: ‘Mummy, you’re beautiful, can I have a biscuit?’ – if only grown men were as clever!
Kelly, 26 May 2011

Seriously loves her babies, this overwhelming love that overflows my heart that it pours out my eyes in the form of tears, but I’m not sad; I’m proud… Ethan, Jake, you are so precious to me.
Kelly, 8 December 2010

I asked Jake, ‘where are your kidneys?’ He pointed to his knees and said ‘here’s my kid’s knees!!’ lol – Then I proceeded to ask ‘where is your shin?’ He pointed to his chin! 🙂
Kelly, 9 June 2012

Ethan: “Mum, when is my wish from the wishing-well going to come true?”
Me: “I don’t know, darling, you’ll have to be patient.” 
Ethan: “I know, why don’t you get your iPad and type into google ‘when do wishes come true?’ Then we will know!”
Lol. Is my 6 yr old a genius or just plain silly?!
Kelly, 9 October 2012

Getting dressed this morning, in the bedroom, starkers! Jake walks in with leap pad: “Mum, say cheese!” *snap*
“Jake, nooooo, not when I’m naked! Delete that picture!”
Jake responds: “No!… Ok, I will if you get me a Ben10 watch!”
I’m being bribed by my four-year-old!
Kelly, 12 October 2012

Sitting at traffic lights in the car watching some window cleaners trying to position a ladder and grunting at each other, 
Ethan asks: “Mum, are they robbers?”
Lol made my morning… They did look dodgy!
Kelly, 15 December 2012

“Mum, I can’t help carry the shopping because my energy is broken.”
Ethan, 28 January 2013

Kelly: “Boys, what planet is nearest the sun?”
Jake: “The really hot one!”
28 January 2013

Eating at the dinner table this evening with my boys;
Ethan: “Mum, did you get this chicken from the pet shop?”
29 January 2013

How to prolong bedtime (from the expert Ethan Griffin) 
Ethan: “Mum, I just need to wash my hands, I got a bogey” 
Kelly: “Quickly then” Ethan comes out of the bathroom with dripping hands.
Ethan: “Mum, can you see if I dried these properly?” 
Kelly: “No, they’re not. Go and dry them.”
Ethan: “Mum, I need moisturising cream or Sudocream for my skin.” 
Kelly: “Ok. Go and get some from my room.” Three minutes later Ethan comes in the lounge in a coy way; “Don’t get mad mum, I can’t find it.” 
Kelly: “Ok I’ll get it.” Cream on hands… “Now to bed!” 
Ethan: “Mum, I need a poo!” 
Patience indeed!

Ethan: “Mum, can I go to that phone box, it’s got WiFi!!! Pleeeeeease mum!”
3 August 2013

Jake: “Mum, I want to give you my heart.” Then put his arm down his top and attempted to rip out his heart, then looked at me and said “but I can’t because it’s really going to hurt me.”
3 August 2013

Jake: “Mum, last night Ethan said the P word to me.” 
Kelly: “What’s the P word?” 
Jake: “Pie!!!” 
Kelly: “Right, ok!” 
24 September 2014

Ethan: “Your mum is so fat she can’t stand up!”
Jake: “Yeah, well your mum is so fat she can’t talk anything!” 
Ethan: “Your mumma is so fat that she stinks…”

I thought they knew they had the same mum
22 November 2014

Ethan: “Mum, even though you’re angry sometimes, I always know you still love me because I know you’ll never break my heart.”
26 November 2014

Ethan: “Jake, why are you wearing shorts again?”
Jake: “Because I’m too sexy for my trousers!”
Ethan: “What!? You’re not sexy! You will be when you’re 18, but not now!”
Jake: “I’m too sexy for my trousers!”
11 May 2017

Whilst answering a quiz question, we were all asked by Ethan, to define ‘the true meaning of Christmas.’ Jake replied:

The true meaning of Xmas is to savour the moment of your family and spend time with people around you and friends. To give each other presents and hugs and those who might be sad, give them some joy.  
23 December 2020

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